Since I last posted we have had two interviews, for two seperate little ones. The first interview was two weeks ago for a 1yr old and went well, in our eyes (but as yet no feedback).
The second interview (for a 2yr )last week was crap, it appears MR and MRS insensitive SS decided to start with the IVF scenario questions.
"Ie your last IVF was quite recent", yes almost two years since I last injected myself to the - i muttered a negative way, i really wanted to say something else but didn't.
"How and when did you decide to adopt was prior to IVF or after?", I almost died talk about opening up a bloody big wound. I HAVE MOVED ON AND NOW WANT TO ADOPT ARS*H%%%%!
There were loads of stupid parenting questions, which annoyed me, ie I don't have children yet but expect to take the good bits from my upbringing and parent a child the same way.
MR SS had the audacity to tell me parenting was a hard job, REALLY!!!!!!!!!!
Anyway after 3 hrs of pure dribble waste of time- in my eyes the interview was over.
Those IVF questions got my back up and I felt I was defending my reason for adopting. I think we lost that interview because I was so upset and angry, I couldn't be my self and was quite tense and told both SS's at various stages I didnt agree and they were basically talking bollocks.
During that interview we didn't receive one positive feedback about our parenting skills or were not complemented at all.
So it looks like Pandora box has been opened and I am so annoyed and angry with this process. This has nothing to do with a child being placed but with people ie SS being totally insensitive regarding other needs , having no empathy and playing GOD. They can keep the child, I am not interested if I have to kiss arse.
A friend of mine had suggested during the wait process I should venture into shops and browse and think about the nursery, ie stuff we need to buy. So far because I haven't had the confidence because I don't have a great big expanded tummy. Really I am unable to visit any shops and look at baby things because I feel like a great big fraud ie I am adopting, it is no longer becoming a positive thing as the process is so hard.
Also since this crazy interview last week, a deep cloud has descended on me and I worry will I ever be a mom.
The annoying thing is, I have no one else to talk to, all my friends are yummy mummy's.
Aplogs for the annoying post but I had to let of steam
Health karma
6 years ago
1 comment:
I've had my bouts of anger with the adoption process, but on the other hand, I've had loads of time to process stuff. A good book to read would be Raising Adopted Children by Lois Ruskin Melina. Not only will it help you with your interviews, it will give you the language to talk to the social workers about. Yep, one has to jump through a lot of hoops, but the social workers are not there to support you. That's been the tough part - sometimes I just wanted someone on my side - and luckily I have my bloggy pals.
Post a Comment